I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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