Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
