I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Randomize
