my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
