literally had 100 drinks last night.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
