Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
