Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
