Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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