I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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