While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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