youre lurking in front of me
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
