absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
