so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
