4 words: hood of his car
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
