You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
my nose is crying tears of wow.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
