Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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