I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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