Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
don't judge my taste in strippers
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
