Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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