I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
