it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
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