my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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