Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
