She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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