Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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