turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
