He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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