I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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