i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
