Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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