Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
