is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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