Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
