Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
