Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
