I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
