I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
