Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
