If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
