god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
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