she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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