at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
