She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
