Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
