just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
