he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
