just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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