Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
