theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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