Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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