please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
barbara walters just said penis...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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